So, I had almost enough frequent flier miles to get a free ticket. It cost less to buy additional miles than it would have to purchase the ticket outright. Then, I found out there’s an “Animal Fibers Fair” in Asheville and I’ve really wanted to find some nice wool to do some fancier projects. And I looooove Asheville. And I haven’t been back home in a long time.
I haven’t been more than 45 miles away from Shannon in two years. The mere thought of it makes my stomach clench into little knots. I’m not worried about anything happening to me. I’m afraid of being far away if something happened to him. I stopped making him check in as soon as he got to work about a year ago, but I still prefer it if he tells me when he’s leaving the office every evening. It’s the being unable to get to him right away if he needed me that I can’t seem to get beyond.
I booked the ticket. The little bit I paid for it is non-refundable. It’s not like I’m going off on my own to some strange place. I’m going to visit my mom and dad. And I’m really looking forward to it. I just wish it didn’t make me so anxious. I know it’s just one of those hurdles I have to get past. I just wish it didn’t feel like such a BIG hurdle.