I’ve reached that point where I no longer feel like I’ve been sucker punched. Heck, I’ve even caught myself laughing a couple of times this weekend. But then, something happens…I’ll be singing along to a favorite song and really hear the lyrics…that damn commercial with the mother and her daughter walking down the street, growing older, the daughter having children, will come on the tv…and I fall apart for a few minutes all over again.
Sunday didn’t help. I tried to have an anti-mother’s day. While S took his mother out for brunch, I took myself to my favorite shopping heaven…IKEA. I got up early so I could have breakfast there, before they opened(I know, it’s an illness, but I love cafeteria food). I’d made a list last week of what I needed to get and I had a budget of some mad money beyond what the must-haves would cost. But, I got there, and instead of their usual real scrambled eggs, they’d made powdered eggs. Instead of the usual oven roasted potatoes with peppers and onions, they had food service diced potatoes. Then, there was the greeter, happily chirpping “Happy Mother’s Day” to every woman who walked in with a child, while I walked in alone. And let’s not forget that the children’s section is right next to the cafe (and the only bathroom on the second floor) so I had to pass by the crib and dresser that I’ve had circled in my catalog since we started this journey. I don’t think I’ve ever left that store in under three hours and for less than $150 before. I didn’t even spend any of my fun money. So for anti-mother’s day, I got three curtain rods, two bath towels, a couple of shelves, and a jar for S’s granola. Oh, and let’s not forget two days of the worst menstrual cramps I’ve had in a long time. No one ever remembers to warn you that after you’ve pumped so many hormones into your system you might want to stock up on the opiates to get you through the cramps.
Tomorrow is my follow-up consultation. I’ll get information on a FET cycle. I’ll find out if she thinks there’s anything we could have done differently. I’m going to question her about the extended bleeding I had at the beginning of the cycle as well as the pain that has accompanied the luteal phase of the last two cycles.
I hear you girl. I am feeling better now, but my anti-mother’s day was a bit rough too. Good luck with your follow up tomorrow.
You went to IKEA on Mother’s day? What where you thinking. IKEA is always CRAWLING with families.
I sure didn’t enjoy my visits over the last few years.
“You went to IKEA on Mother’s day? What where you thinking.”
Mostly I was thinking that my bedroom looks stupid with just one curtain hanging up (since I didn’t buy all the parts I needed last year and didn’t realize it until I HUNG the curtains during last Wednesday’s marathon clean) and S has an intense dislike for going to IKEA so going when he had plans was ideal AND it was payday weekend and I thought some retail therapy would help.
I also really, really like institutional breakfasts.